Talk To Me

The language of lovemaking does not need to be verbal. Most everything expressed during sex can be transmitted in moans and movements. The rate and intensity of your breathing speaks volumes. The gyrations from your hips provide a roadmap for him to follow. You just need to provide the signals upon which he can react.

Instruction during lovemaking requires a fine balance; too little and you leave him guessing. Too much and he is intimidated. Men need signs from their ladies confirming what he's doing feels good to you. He wants to know he is providing the pleasure you expect and deserve.  Here are some recommendations:

#1 Nonverbal instructions can easily be conveyed using your hands. Simply put his hand where you want it to be. With your fingers on top of his create the movements that you like. When he begins to do things the way you want it done give him some positive reinforcement by squirming, moaning or pulling yourself into him. Press on his hand when it's good; ease his hand back when it's not.

#2 Let him know that he has taken your direction and is now using it for your pleasure. When he starts to go the wrong way, don't pull away. Please, no quick negative reaction. That can be a mood killer. Slowly change positions, rotate carefully in another direction or begin aggressive sex play on him. This stops the discomfort without bashing his ego. He wants to please. He wants direction. Just try to keep it positive.

#3 Guide him with the only word you ever need during good sex - YES. Whispering that single word when he has found the mark is the most positive sign you can give. Men love to hear YES. The louder and more frequent we hear YES the harder (pun intended) we try. YES is our verbal aphrodisiac. Keep saying YES and we know we are giving you what you want.

There are two sides to this story. Men want, more than anything else, to please you during lovemaking. And selfishly they like a little attention along the way. Remember, both of you need to provide direction to each other. Sexual communication is the key to a fantastic sexual relationship. Provide the signals he needs to be your perfect lover AND encourage from him the guidance you need to reciprocate.